Untold
by Kyoku.x
Summary: My submissions for the 30 kisses challenge. JiraiyaTsunade pairing. Semidisconnected oneshots, drabbles, and ficlets.
1. Those Days

**Title: **Those Days  
**Theme:** #4 Our Distance and That Person  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

**-!-!-**

When we were genins I never thought I would miss you. Or at least not this much. But the more I travel, the more I think about you—and…and him, too…of course. And I realize how much I miss those days. When we were together—I mean…when the ­_three_ of us were...still together.

I miss those days so much…do you remember the kind of days I'm talking about?

There was that day that we were playing Truth or Dare and I dared Orochimaru to kiss you…neither one of you talked to me for _weeks_.

And then there was that day I talked you and Orochimaru into playing strip poker… you both agreed because you knew that I would lose.

And…there was that day we were working as undercover security for some Lord's daughter's wedding…and you couldn't stop telling me how beautiful I was.

Remember those days?

…I do…


	2. The Kid

**Title: **The Kid  
**Theme:** #20, The Road Home  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

**-!-!-**

"The kid's a lot like you. Noisy, obnoxious, unruly, brash, annoying…but a heart of pure gold."

"I figured you'd think that about him; that's why I brought him along with me."

"You're a conniving old man, Jiraiya. It was cruel of you to set me up like that. You knew that I would meet him and instantly think of my past. You knew that I would see my brother and Dan in him." _And you…more than anything else_, I think to myself.

He doesn't answer me and I let the issue rest for a moment, but there's something I need to say.

"Jiraiya?"

"Hm?"

"Just don't corrupt him, okay?"

He throws me a glance but refuses to respond.

"Jiraiya, I don't want to see him grow up to be a perverted old man like you who'll do _anything_ for a kiss from a pretty girl."

"Alright…alright, Tsunade…" he chuckles, "but, you should know that someone of my caliber doesn't have to "do anything" to get a kiss…" He turns towards me and I raise an eyebrow at his Cheshire-like grin. "Although, if some of my magnetism just happens to…rub off on him…I can't help it."


	3. Illustrations

**Title: **Illustrations  
**Theme:** #26, If Only I Could Make You Mine  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

A/N: Thanks once again to Melissa, my wonderful beta! XD

**-!-!-**

I sigh, lean back against the wood paneling behind me and close my eyes. For a moment, I let my thoughts settle before re-reading what I've just written. Sighing a second time, I glance down at the pages once more. It's an elaborate scene, one of my favorites I think, even if this particular section goes no further than a kiss.

I rub my hands together and look over what I have outlined for the illustration. As always, the heroine of the scene looks just a little bit like Tsunade and the hero resembles me, ever so slightly. I never intend for it to work out that way, it's almost as if my pen creates the images on its own. It never seems quite right if I try drawing the characters any other way, so I've stopped attempting to change it. After all, I doubt anyone else would ever notice.

I go over the text once more before I lean back and stare at the ceiling above. _If only…_, I think before my eyelids meet and my train of thought takes off to the next scene.


	4. Wonder

**Title: **Wonder  
**Theme:** #6, The Space Between Dream and Reality  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

A/N: This could almost be seen as a companion to the last installment, _Illustrations_, although they could very well stand on their own.

**-!-!-**

I've never told anyone, but I think Jiraiya is an incredible writer. Most people look at his work and assume that there is nothing but filth between the orange covers of his books, ess continue. I begin to wonder if he would have treated me the same way that his heroes treat his heroines if I had ever given him the chance.

Part of me imaginings that he would have, but I never like to dwell on it long. If I do I start noticing things that I'm never quite sure are really there or not, like how the heroine's hair is styled similarly to mine or how the hero's eyes are almost exactly like his.


	5. Swing

**Title: **Swing  
**Theme:** #22, Cradle  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

**-!-!-**

_Back and forth…_

_And back and forth…_

Back and forth, and back and forth; so it is that the pendulum of time swings. Like a child's cradle it swings back and forth, back and forth, never ceasing its monotonous, simplistic, comforting sway. Sometimes malevolent, always compassionate, it never stops.

_Back and forth…_

_And back and forth…_

Back and forth, and back and forth; so it is that we reflect on life, always drawing almost close enough to brush Past's cheek with the slightest breath, but always quickly drawing back at the last moment. Sometimes we wish we could reach out and grasp it and hold it tight, sometimes we wish to forget it completely, but we never can.

_And back…_

_And…_

Back and forth, and back and forth they drift, so close one moment and then suddenly eons separate them. Always they return, knowing how much they truly want each other, but only to drift away again, fearing the close contact. Always swinging, always moving, and always swaying.

_…__Forth_


	6. She Started Young

**Title: **She Started Young  
**Theme:** #10, no. 10  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

**-!-!-**

"Jiraiya! Staring at your cards like that won't make them all magically change; decide already!"

"Tsunade, this game requires skill…strategy…concentration. You cannot rush these things."

"Oh, _please_ Jiraiya; if you don't hurry up we're going to make your decision for you." She huffed and turned to her other companion, "Orochimaru…make him hurry up."

The said genin lifted his glass of lemonade to his lips and took a sip, drawing the moment out as if savoring the taste of lemon on his lips for the first time. He finally spoke, "I believe that when sensei told us he wanted us to spend our day off together he also asked that you two at least _try_ not to bicker."

"I _did_ try," Tsunade pouted defensively, "It's impossible to get along with _that _idiot."

Jiraiya's face fell slightly at her biting words, but he covered it up quickly as he sighed dramatically and made a flourish with his arm. "I have decided!" He paused for good measure and proclaimed with enthusiasm, "Tsunade…do you have any…_tens_?"

Tsunade blinked once before narrowing her eyes at her teammate. "I _despise_ you," she seethed, grudgingly handing over two of her cards.

He chuckled, enjoying his small victory as she stuck her tongue out at him. "Love you too, Tsunade," he said teasingly.


	7. Touch the Sky

**Title: **Touch the Sky  
**Theme:** #15, Perfect Blue  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

**-!-!-**

I've always had this nagging little wish to soar through the flawless azure oblivion far above. I've always wished I could dance high above the earth and kiss the clouds. I've always wanted to touch the sky.

A long time ago, when I was still young, I asked sensei privately if there was a jutsu to help me defy gravity; he smiled and said that there was, but not one that could be preformed with mere seals and chakra. I didn't quite understand him but—

"Tsunade?" I jump slightly, not expecting the sudden interruption.

"J-Jiraiya?" I stutter, my mind slowly returning from where it had been gliding in the open, sapphire expanse above, "What…are you doing here?"

He studies me a moment, as if he's trying to figure out some great mystery, then shakes his head slightly, "Nothing." He smirks and turns to the sky, "I thought you stopped your habit a long time ago…appears I was wrong."

My eyes widen slightly at his comment before I close them and turn away, "My habit?"

"Don't lie, Tsunade…I can't count the number of times I noticed you watching the sky like it was a lord's feast and you were a starved peasant," he chuckles slightly, "Tsunade, don't look so shocked…anyone would have noticed."

He turns to me and grins. I smirk, trying to hide my previous surprise, before letting my gaze turn upwards yet again, "We all have our dreams, Jiraiya…"

He's silent for a moment, but I feel his eyes searching me for something. I refuse turn to acknowledge his attention and the silence quickly becomes thunderous in my ears. He steps forward unexpectedly, cups my chin in his hand, and forces my eyes to meet his. "I know, Tsunade—" he stops himself from saying more, his eyes soften and too suddenly for me to react, he pulls me close to him. "Believe me, I know…" he whispers into my hair.

My arms return the embrace of their own accord, and my face instinctively nestles into the crook of his neck. I don't say anything—I don't need to—because in that moment I suddenly understand what sensei meant those many years ago.

_Thank you, Jiraiya, for helping me touch the sky._


	8. Goodbye

**Title: **Goodbye  
**Themes: #**5, "ano sa" ("hey, you know...")  
**Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto.

Author's Notes: The ages are probably off. Deal with it. ;D

**-!-!-**

That year summer had refused to give up its hold on Konoha. It was early November and as warm and sunny as mid-June. The two of them were laying on their backs, stretched out watching the clouds go by. It was something the two of them used to enjoy when they were younger, albeit separately. When they were genins they couldn't stand each other, but their childish grudges had long since subsided, allowing them the solace of a strong friendship.

"Hey…Tsunade," Jiraiya began, "I'm turning twenty-nine next week."

She laughed and roller onto her side, propping herself up on her elbow, "I know that, you idiot, you think I forgot like _someone _forgot mine?"

He smiled, it was a game between them; they both knew there were no hard feelings between them. "I told you I was sorry…And I know that you wouldn't have forgotten. It's just…I dunno…Feels like I'm getting old…And just…I guess I just figured that by now, out of all the girls I've dated, I'd have gotten at least one real kiss."

Tsunade laughed again, "Please Jiraiya, you've had to have gotten at least _one_."

"Nope," he answered simply. "But I think I know what I'm missing."

"And what would that be?"

"The right girl."

Tsunade chuckled softly, "And why is that? I never would have imagined that the great lady's-man Jiraiya would have trouble getting a woman."

"The one I want is too afraid," he answered in a more serious tone. Jiraiya propped himself up and faced her. Tsunade quieted immediately and held his fixed, solemn gaze for one long, bone-chilling moment before her eyes fell to the ground between them.

"I've had to say goodbye to too many people, Jiraiya…" she whispered, almost as if answering herself instead of him, "I won't let it happen again…" She stood up to leave, not even giving him a second glance. Jiraiya fell back onto the grass and closed his eyes.

Jiraiya herd the gentle whisper of the grass as she began to walk away and spoke suddenly, his voice straining to retain his raging emotions. "So instead of saying goodbye later you'd rather say it to me now?"

Tsunade stopped and turned back, her eyes shimmering with the indication of oncoming tears. She opened her mouth for a response but none came. She closed it and bit her tongue; the expression on his face was too difficult to read. Perhaps sorrow, perhaps anger, even after all the time they had spent together since adolescence she couldn't tell. She opened and shut her mouth once more before turning and slowly making her way back towards the village. As she went, Jiraiya opened his eyes and watched her leave. He was about to call out to her, but decided against it. He regretted it the rest of his life, for the next time he saw her they were thirty years older and by then it was too late; by then they had already said goodbye to the future they could have had.


	9. No Answer

**Title: **No Answer  
**Theme:** #24, Good Night  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

AN: Yes, it's horrible; blame finals and horrible, crazy English teachers……consider yourself warned...

**-!-!-**

"Jiraiya?"

"What," his answer is tired and exasperated.

"I was…just wondering if you were…still awake."

"…Go to sleep Tsunade," he mutters before he hunches his shoulders as if to bar me from speaking. I know that we're both tired and that we both need our sleep. I also know that both sensei and Orochimaru are fast asleep and that if I don't take this chance I'll regret it tomorrow morning.

"…But…I—"

"Good night, Tsunade."

"…Good night, Jiraiya," I whisper. I wait a few moments; he isn't going to say any more. Reluctantly, I admit defeat and roll over so that I'm not forced to stare at his back as sleep evades me; the shadows of the forest around us are much more forgiving.

I close my eyes and will for sleep to come. It seems like months—years even—but in reality it's probably no more than five minutes before I give up and let my eyes slide open. The darkness beyond seems more malevolent than before and I lift the edge of my bedroll over my nose as I nibble on my bottom lip nervously—an old childhood habit from when the boogey-man still lurked under my bed.

A sudden breeze kicks up and the bushes move as if to reach out and snatch me away. I whimper involuntarily and without thinking I try to move away from the brush. Suddenly I freeze as my back comes into contact with Jiraiya's and chide myself for acting so childishly. He grunts and shifts slightly in his sleep.

"Jiraiya?"

He mutters something I can't discern.

"…Jiraiya?" I whisper, hopeful.

There is no answer.


	10. The Meeting

**Title: **The Meeting  
**Theme:** #12, In a Good Mood  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

**-!-!-**

"Ah, there you are Jiraiya-sama!" Kotetsu quipped from behind the stack of books he was carrying. He turned sideways to get a better look at the older man, "Tsunade-sama has been looking for you."

The seasoned ninja looked like a child caught stealing a cookie from the cookie jar. "And…how long has she been...er…looking exactly?"

"All morning…I'll run up and let her know that you're here."

"Ah…oh don't bother. I'll go right up after I see—" But whatever excuse to not visit the hokage the poor man was going to come up with was cut off as said hokage came hurtling down the hallway towards them.

"Jiraiya! You'd better have a good excuse for why you weren't there yesterday or heaven help me I'll make you kiss dirt!" But Jiraiya was already down the long hallway and out the front door of the building.

Shizune came trailing after her mentor and Kotetsu looked at her with a raised eyebrows. "What was that about?"

"She asked him to attend the meeting with Sand yesterday…"

"Ah…" Silence reigned a few moments before Kotetsu sighed and shrugged, "At least she's in a good mood today."

Shizune laughed lightly and nodded.


	11. In a Rush

**Title: **In a Rush  
**Theme:** #9, dash  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

**-!-!-**

When I was little, I never really though much about my "Prince Charming." I was always dashing here and there, in a rush to grow up and become the strongest and the fastest. I knew what I wanted.

Then I got a little bit older. I met Dan. I was always running here and there with him, still chasing my dreams but without the same focused determination. It seemed okay that I was spending more time with him than with my weapons and targets. I thought I knew what I wanted.

Then I aged eons in a split second. Dan lay dying and my dreams of living with _him_ vanished as fast as I had once dreamed of becoming. Part of my willpower died with him, but all I had ever known was chasing my dreams and I remembered my original goal. I knew what I wanted again, but I knew I could never obtain it while surrounded with ghosts of 'what ifs.'

Then my friends—well, one of them—came after me. I had mused one day at lunch what it would be like to just up and leave it all behind and he hadn't said a word. I had stupidly assumed that he hadn't caught my hint that I was leaving. That night as I proceeded down the path that led to the front gate, hoping to make my escape unnoticed, he appeared behind me and crushed me to his chest, breathing heavily in my ear as though he had just woken from a nightmare. "Please let me go with you," he begged, "I can't live without you."

The tone of his voice made me all the more eager to leave my past—my pain—behind.

"Please, Tsunade," he pleaded, "I want you…I _need_ you with me."

I don't know why I couldn't stand to hear his voice so strained. Maybe it was because Dan had told me the same things: that he wanted me, that he needed me. However, there was one thing Dan had never told me.

"Tsunade…I love you."

Dan had never said he _loved_ me.

"Please…stay…"

Never, _ever_ had he said he loved me.

His grip loosened and I slowly peeled away from him. I stood apart from him a moment, not looking at him. "I have dreams elsewhere," I said before slowly moving forward and through the gate. I half expected him to try and stop me, but he let me go without a fight. I don't know why, but I was sad that he didn't.

The second I was outside of the village walls I broke into a mad dash, and I continued running until he caught me again—this time with that brat of his in tow—to ask me to come back and become Hokage. I accepted because I had come to realize that I truly did want to help the village I had been running from for so long.

I don't mind being back too badly, but when I'm watching him teach Naruto as if the boy was his own son, I can't help but wonder if Jiraiya would have been what he said he wanted to be.

It scares me, but I've realized that I don't know what I want anymore.


	12. Worried

**Title: **Worried  
**Theme:** #19, Red  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

**-!-!-**

The moon was full and glowing that night, but the evening goddess was nothing compared to you. I whispered how gorgeous I thought you were in red; it suited you. You laughed gaily, the joyous sound danced on the warm summer air before you moved on towards the center of the red bridge. You leaned against the railing and said something inaudible but it made me smile all the same.

I watched you a moment, the moonlight washed over you and it was all I could do to not reach out, grab you by the waist and kiss you senseless with moans and whispers of 'I love you.'

It makes sense that he couldn't resist either. Probably gentler than I could have, he took you by the shoulders, pulled you close to him and kissed you softly. I don't know what happened after that because I left my leafy watchtower and went home. All I know is that the next day neither one of you was quite focused on our training, and once we were dismissed the both of you disappeared faster than I would have thought possible.

It wasn't that I thought that he would hurt you that made me follow the both of you on your first date. Or your second. Or your third or fourth. I probably would have followed you even up until your wedding and probably after, but there was no fifth or sixth date. There was no wedding announcement or wedding. There wasn't even a good-bye note from him to either one of us. I can understand why he might have forgotten me, his best friend, but to forget you…I'll never be able to understand that.

The sunrise that morning was blood-red, and the god of the day decided he would shine forth happy and bright on that sad day. You came pounding on my door, disheveled and distraught with two ANBU rounding the corner toward my doorway and towards you. You gasped for air and your wide, tear-filled eyes sought comfort and safety. I gently took you by the shoulders and led you inside. You collapsed on my sofa and began sobbing inaudible, senseless things about how he had left you and me and the entire village.

It was all I could do to not reach out, grab you by the waist and kiss you senseless with moans and whispers of 'I love you.' But if I'd learned anything from watching the two of you it was to ignore those instincts. So instead I wrapped you as tight as I could in my arms and held you until you sobbed yourself to sleep.

I supposed that I should have worried he would hurt you after all.


	13. Tsunade's Garden

**Title: **Tsunade's Garden  
**Theme:** #11, Gardenia  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

A/N: I don't like this one, but I've been trying to fix it for nearly a year and still haven't come up with something good so this is what ya get for this theme.

**-!-!-**

I'm glad Tsunade decided to plant this garden. It's an excellent place to sit and write; completely secluded from the distractions of missions and training and gathering data. This particular, hidden little alcove I've found is especially nice this time of year. It's early June, and the gardenia plants that surround this quiet place are in full bloom.

The flowers remind me of Tsunade, although I'm not sure why. The petals, I've noticed, bruise easily; even if you were to give them the gentlest kiss they would probably turn brown. She isn't like that; Tsunade's strong and tough, if anything. And if I remember correctly, I think I read once that the plants have somewhat sensitive roots and do well in pots. After having to chase her around for so long I would never claim Tsunade to the type to enjoy being fixed in one place for an extensive period.

But back to writing, it's getting late and I always like to be able to pack up and enjoy the sunset feeling accomplished.

**--**

_Gardenia…secret love._


End file.
